DO you have a friend named DicK? I don't.BUT - I certainly know a lot of Dicks. Dicks don't come easy in my life. I've only but encountered probably 3 or 4 in my entire lifetime.
Today was one of those unfortunate days.
Today was such a crazy day! It feels like the planets are so misaligned. Apart from a crazy, hectic day at work, I had a looney, let's just name him DICK -who read my blog somewhere and launched an all out personal attack on me and justified his senseless and pathetic rant by saying that I deserve to be treated that way because of my vehicle preferences (i.e. Hummer and my love for gas guzzlers).OH and then he even had the huevo to say that if I drove an Aston Martin, then I would probably be treated differently. I'm like, duh huh?! Whatever. I've friends who actually roll on an Aston Martin, Bentley and Rolls Royce everyday and were never even close to being named Dicks.Come to think of it, these friends of mine are nice, successful and did I mention goodlooking, to even come close to even be called, DICKS.
Anyway, as if that wasn't enough, soon as my friend deleted the link to my blog on her facebook page so "Dick" cannot access it and comment on it anymore, "Dick" had the audacity to send me a -lo and behold- super duper longgggggggggg private message on my facebook - never mind that I don't even know him - to continue his senseless, stupid and ignorant rant. What was in that email isn't even relevant or important to share because clearly, Dick needs attention.Dick needs someone to talk to.Dick needs to get laid!But that ain't coming from me honey. HELL No!Dick is so pathetic and soooo annoying a girl would probably have more pleasure reading Charlie Sheen's insane tweets than deal with Dick.Face.
I feel sorry for Dick. I wondered why he had so much hate in his heart I just had to weasle in his facebook profile. I figured, well if I had a face like that, I would probably be bitter. If I was a stay at home dad and wifey didn't also seem to have a real job, then I guess I would be bitter too. AND...if I thought that the Prius is the most sophisticated and technically advanced car in the whole wide world and owning one would ENTITLE me to berrate anyone who doesn't and most specially people who drive gas guzzlers, then I guess I would be bitter too. HAHAHA! Seriously, I don't think Dick has ever tried out, much less touched or smelled a Lambo or a Ferrari in his lifetime!Poor Dick!
I wonder how Dick treats the women in his life. I suppose if Dick could go off on a stranger he doesn't even know and rant the whole day senseless and stupid things, I can only imagine how he goes off on a rampage when he is with his wife, sister or mother. I wonder how wifey ever feels every night she has to sleep next to Dick.
On the other hand, I also wonder how women treat Dick. Whatever the case may be, I surely am so glad I do not know this Dick. Thankful I don't have his life, his outrage, and his plain fugly and obviously pathetic life.
Goodbye and good night Dickface. I do not look forward to hearing from you ever again. I certainly do not aspire to be in your list of your so called pathetic list of friends. Thank you God for making my life Dick free!Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-men!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Of Hummers and Priuses
Don't get me wrong. I have a lot of friends who drive Priuses and I sincerely, honestly love, love them to death. Ironically though, 9 out of the 10 times someone would either cut me off, tailgate, or even have the nerve to race me on the freeway, it would have to be...yes you totally guessed it right...some little fugly biatch or a**hole driving the mighty "let's save earth" PRIUS.
I mean, I just don't get it. So, people buy those little overpriced dunebugs to "save the earth". Yet you see them speeding through neighborhoods, driving like hell drivers doing 60 in a 25 mile zone...along shopping centers, school zones, school parking lots, parks...great gawd, I feel like they want to save the earth but don't have any regard at all for human beings...so what is the point then?
Then there are those who try to race you on the freeway and drive as if they were driving a Lamborghini or a Ferrari, or maybe -just maybe - even a Mustang.Sometimes I just shake my head and laugh, roll my eyes and yes, flip them the middle finger when they try to be a Jimmie Johnson and then sput sput choke in the middle of their road rage...hahahahaha!
Not so long ago, as I was parking my Hummer in a shopping center to go to Walgreens, this woman - who was driving the holy god let's save the world Prius - gave me the dirtiest of the dirtiest look. I felt like she was trying to cast an evil spell on me as she shot me the stinky eye when I got down my vehicle. Being one not to be pushed against the wall by bullies, I asked this bitch what her problem was. She then told me that MY vehicle was her problem. How could I drive a Hummer. A gas guzzler that is just so harmful and bad for the environment. She was talking to me with so much hatred in her tone it made me feel like I actually just killed someone just because I was driving the Hummer. Aghast and just plainly livid at this ignorant c*nt, I then fired back at her at how many trees needed to be cut down to produce her stupid car. At how her batteries aren't helping the environment at all and how stupid drivers who drive her stupid car and get into an accident need to call a firetruck everytime they get into an accident because of the queer needs of her stupid car. Oh and by the way, I told her to get a f*cking hobby and if she needed me to give her $20 so she can find someone else to talk to.
I then walked inside Walgreens and she continued to follow me. Lo and behold, we were to go to the same department too!Woohoo - this has got to be my lucky day! I got to the photo department first so I got served first - much to her dismay.
I handed the store clerk, Shawnie, 2 printer cartridges for her to fill. Stupid Prius lady asked me what those were and what I needed done. I then told her sarcastically that I, a Hummer driver that she hates so much, as a matter of fact, am having my printer cartridges refilled because, yes b*tch, I do recycle and yes c*nt, I am concious of how I utilize my resources...even if I drive a f*cking earth destroying Hummer.
We were then about to start a round two of our heated debate when Shawnie (the store clerk) asked me what Prius bitch's problem was. I then told her about how she was berrating me by solely judging me with what I drove. Prius lady then started to cut in.At this point, I was so exasperated and aghast at this fugly wart who needed to find a hobby other than starting out tense and fierce conversations with SUV driving strangers like me.I was so ready to bitchslap Ms. High and Mighty and just pay the $500 fine when Shawnie, as if on cue, blurted out, "Hummer or Prius, it don't matter at all. Y'all are lucky to even have a vehicle to drive. I have to walk and take the bus everyday so I can go to work. I wish I had a beater to make my life easier.I wish I had a car so I can see my kids sooner than having to commute for 3 hours just to get back home."
Wow. Just like that. It was as if heaven opened up to slap BOTH me and Prius bitch on the face. Sometimes it takes ONE person to open our eyes and teach us to just let things slide even when people are sometimes mean to us or say mean things to us. I was embarassed but the same time so thankful for this woman who made me realize how we often take so many things for granted and make so much fuss over things that really don't matter at all.
Happy Monday twitter world. It's been a crazy day but at the end of the day, I am thankful for such a crazy day because of being blessed with so much work.Good night.Be careful of self righteous Prius driving bitches - LOL!
I mean, I just don't get it. So, people buy those little overpriced dunebugs to "save the earth". Yet you see them speeding through neighborhoods, driving like hell drivers doing 60 in a 25 mile zone...along shopping centers, school zones, school parking lots, parks...great gawd, I feel like they want to save the earth but don't have any regard at all for human beings...so what is the point then?
Then there are those who try to race you on the freeway and drive as if they were driving a Lamborghini or a Ferrari, or maybe -just maybe - even a Mustang.Sometimes I just shake my head and laugh, roll my eyes and yes, flip them the middle finger when they try to be a Jimmie Johnson and then sput sput choke in the middle of their road rage...hahahahaha!
Not so long ago, as I was parking my Hummer in a shopping center to go to Walgreens, this woman - who was driving the holy god let's save the world Prius - gave me the dirtiest of the dirtiest look. I felt like she was trying to cast an evil spell on me as she shot me the stinky eye when I got down my vehicle. Being one not to be pushed against the wall by bullies, I asked this bitch what her problem was. She then told me that MY vehicle was her problem. How could I drive a Hummer. A gas guzzler that is just so harmful and bad for the environment. She was talking to me with so much hatred in her tone it made me feel like I actually just killed someone just because I was driving the Hummer. Aghast and just plainly livid at this ignorant c*nt, I then fired back at her at how many trees needed to be cut down to produce her stupid car. At how her batteries aren't helping the environment at all and how stupid drivers who drive her stupid car and get into an accident need to call a firetruck everytime they get into an accident because of the queer needs of her stupid car. Oh and by the way, I told her to get a f*cking hobby and if she needed me to give her $20 so she can find someone else to talk to.
I then walked inside Walgreens and she continued to follow me. Lo and behold, we were to go to the same department too!Woohoo - this has got to be my lucky day! I got to the photo department first so I got served first - much to her dismay.
I handed the store clerk, Shawnie, 2 printer cartridges for her to fill. Stupid Prius lady asked me what those were and what I needed done. I then told her sarcastically that I, a Hummer driver that she hates so much, as a matter of fact, am having my printer cartridges refilled because, yes b*tch, I do recycle and yes c*nt, I am concious of how I utilize my resources...even if I drive a f*cking earth destroying Hummer.
We were then about to start a round two of our heated debate when Shawnie (the store clerk) asked me what Prius bitch's problem was. I then told her about how she was berrating me by solely judging me with what I drove. Prius lady then started to cut in.At this point, I was so exasperated and aghast at this fugly wart who needed to find a hobby other than starting out tense and fierce conversations with SUV driving strangers like me.I was so ready to bitchslap Ms. High and Mighty and just pay the $500 fine when Shawnie, as if on cue, blurted out, "Hummer or Prius, it don't matter at all. Y'all are lucky to even have a vehicle to drive. I have to walk and take the bus everyday so I can go to work. I wish I had a beater to make my life easier.I wish I had a car so I can see my kids sooner than having to commute for 3 hours just to get back home."
Wow. Just like that. It was as if heaven opened up to slap BOTH me and Prius bitch on the face. Sometimes it takes ONE person to open our eyes and teach us to just let things slide even when people are sometimes mean to us or say mean things to us. I was embarassed but the same time so thankful for this woman who made me realize how we often take so many things for granted and make so much fuss over things that really don't matter at all.
Happy Monday twitter world. It's been a crazy day but at the end of the day, I am thankful for such a crazy day because of being blessed with so much work.Good night.Be careful of self righteous Prius driving bitches - LOL!
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Of fab gowns, dapper suits and facial mishaps...
Luv the Versace on Jennifer Hudson. I think she has a rocking body! And the color of her dress went so well with her skin tone! Love the sexy and naughty red Dolce and Gabbana on Scarlett Johannson. Never been a fan of Halle Berry but I have to admit that was a very elegant gown. I think Reese Witherspoon was the belle of the ball!Her outfit just took my breathe away and I was honestly wondering what was going through Jake Gyllenhall's mind when he saw her tonight.I was like, Ryan Philippe traded her for a Rihanna?It was like trading a Corvette for a Pontiac lol.
I think Ryan Seacrest's Burberry suit was dapper. Not a fan of Justin Timberlake but the dude definitely owned the red carpet tonight along with Hugh Jackman and Matthew McConaughey. Luv Christian Bale but dear God, he was totally barfy!What the hell was he thinking when he put that horrendous suit tonight and please, if you are going to the Oscars, the pubic hair on the face has got to go...yuck!
Goodnight twitter world. It's been wonderful.
I think Ryan Seacrest's Burberry suit was dapper. Not a fan of Justin Timberlake but the dude definitely owned the red carpet tonight along with Hugh Jackman and Matthew McConaughey. Luv Christian Bale but dear God, he was totally barfy!What the hell was he thinking when he put that horrendous suit tonight and please, if you are going to the Oscars, the pubic hair on the face has got to go...yuck!
Goodnight twitter world. It's been wonderful.
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